Sunday, 23 March
Calling out cranky behavior |
Good Morning
Jessicca…
Finally,
another spring! The dead return to the
living, so to speak. Don’t think too
hard on that thought. The sun gives us a
longer, more generous shine. The earth
warms. There are fewer shivers in me
timbers on these days. Feet no longer
freeze at night. Flowers bloom. Bees buzz and everyone has a poetic verse
come to mind. Well put a bee in your
bonnet and may the moon make you think of a big pizza pie. Yeah, that’s amour, eh?
Let’s make a
bountiful Easter hat big enough to feed a family of six. I’m starving.
Let’s make the hat all about appetite.
How do you spell mozzarella?
Thank God for ‘spell check’. We
need plenty of gooey cheese to drip in long strands over the brim. I’m partial to pepperoni. It makes for a good strong color against the
rich, bubbling cheese. We definitely
need plenty of pepperoni. So much
pepperoni, in fact, anyone can smell its oven roasted aroma with only the use
of their eyes. You know, I almost want Cheetos
sprinkled over my hat. No, bad idea. Grilled onion sounds better. My mouth waters. Now that’s a hat too splendid to wear. I did say the size that would serve six,
right? I think maybe six is the new
two. I really am very hungry but I will
share it with you.
Hats smelling
this good are meant to be eaten. We need
to accessorize our hat with a pitcher of something frosty cold. Let’s try it with a movie, as well. How do you feel about watching people swept
up into a world where fists smash bricks and psychic beams send cars flying
through the air? Small moments of mortal
life are reserved for bathroom breaks and quick runs for more Doritos.
We’re all caught
up into our own titanic life or death struggle.
Just beyond that innocuous front door is a raging battle to hold back
the forces of pure evil. Go to the
window. Now! See there… clouds billowing up over the
horizon – it’s global, it’s melodrama, it’s black and white, just and unjust, friend
versus foe. Are you prepared? OK, stand back. There are others here who wish to follow us
into action. Hallelujah. They are your brothers. They need no introduction.
First things
first: the pizza’s gone. I’m sorry.
I should have ordered more. This
is no time for tears, though. Come. We've work to do. Follow me!
Pretend all
kinds of superhero mayhem have just occurred and we've returned victorious,
now, to our ultra-secret Fortress of Superheroes for lunch. I’m famished.
Storm Woman you have the Grilled Chicken Salad with low fat Blue Cheese
Dressing. Colossal Boy has a
double-decker cheeseburger, curly fries and a frosty Dew. Metallica Mind I believe you ordered two
Patty Melts with an Oreo Blizzard. Ultimate
Robot has, of course, the Greased Monkey slathered with extra Virgin Oil. I’m having the peanut butter and jelly
sandwich with toasted sour dough bread and a box of Raisonettes. Dig in, everyone.
Where were
we? Yes, I believe we were discussing
the latest diabolical plot of the evil genius – Professor Death Star. It appears he’s developed a new ragweed
allergy that renders useless any over-the-counter remedy, even maximum strength
potions. I've never suffered such
miserable sinus headache and drainage.
This is only the Ides of March and the pollen season hasn't even yet
begun. I agree with Storm Woman. This calls for an extra-large tissue
dispenser on all our utility belts. Good
thinking Aurora Mom. Be sure we all
schedule a daily nap. Combating mortal
evil requires we have plenty of rest. There’s
no room for cranky behavior here. I
suggest we also send a super tweet to all our superhero followers. In their own modest way they too can benefit
from all these sensible suggestions for fighting this allergy pestilence. Good. It’s
settled, then. We’ll all meet by the
flag pole following our naps. Remember…
capes are mandatory.
Love,
Dad
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